


The Man Your Man Could Smell Like

by Lies_Unfurl



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Clueless Dean, Crack, M/M, POV Dean Winchester, Past Character Death, Possession, Season/Series 07
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-18
Updated: 2017-05-18
Packaged: 2018-11-02 02:07:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 648
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10934745
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lies_Unfurl/pseuds/Lies_Unfurl
Summary: Castiel finds an unconventional vessel after the Leviathan "incident," Sam is weirdly into it, and Dean isn't sure what's going on.





	The Man Your Man Could Smell Like

Dean first begins to suspect that something is wrong when Sam licks his face.

*

Okay, so maybe the way that the giant bottle of Old Spice Aftershave was reduced to a dollar should have been a clue. Maybe the way that the drug store cashier remarked, "Wow, someone's finally taking the haunted shaving stuff!" should have set Dean off. But sue him, no one buys aftershave sober anymore, and anyway, he thought she was joking. Aftershave isn't _haunted_. That would just be stupid.

And technically, it isn't haunted. It's just possessed.

*

"What the fuck!" he snaps at Sam, spinning around and glaring death daggers at him. Then he feels guilty, because maybe Sam is hallucinating that he's a giant popsicle or something? And okay, that wouldn't be Sam's fault. No, that would be the responsibility of Castiel, the Giant Bastard That Dean Still Hates.

His cheek stings suddenly, and he slaps it. Fucking February mosquitoes.

"I—I'm sorry!" Sam blushes a deep, vibrant red. "I don't know what came over me; I… sorry."

Dean stares at him a moment longer. "Is this a Cuckoo's Nest thing? Because if it is, you have to, you know, tell me. Be honest."

"It isn't." Sam shakes his head firmly, his hair swinging in a fluffy swag behind him. "I promise. Just. I don't know."

Dean rubs his Old Spiced chin, feeling the wet traces of Sam's licking. "Um. Okay. Don't… don't do that again, okay?"

"I won't." Sam gulps, and his eyes are fixated on Dean's neck. "Promise."

*

Dean wakes up to the sound of Sam moaning loudly. It sounds kind of like he's saying, "Cas, oh, God, Cas!" 

He sits up straight and gets halfway out of bed before he realizes that Sam is still under his sheets, and that he's stopped moaning. There's a moment of uncomfortable silence, and then Sam says, a hint testily, "Can I have some privacy, please, Dean?"

"Uh, yeah. Sorry." Face burning crimson, he flops down in bed, covering his ears with a pillow. He figures that he probably just misheard, because why the fuck would Sam be dancing solo with Cas's name on his lips?

Later that day, as he rubs on a spot of Old Spice, he thinks that the bottle is glowing very faintly, but he passes that off on the booze he's been drinking.

*

"You smell really good," says Sam, and then he follows that up with, "Oh, God. I'm sorry. I don't know why I just said that."

"I. I think I'm just gonna pretend that you didn't," Dean says firmly, and he does.

*

When the Old Spice starts to talk, he can't ignore it anymore.

Okay, it doesn't _talk_. It just shines a dim blue and emits a high-pitched noise.

He and Sam stare at it, and finally Sam says, "Dean? Can… can angels possess inanimate objects?"

"Like old spice bottles?" he asks, although he knows what the answer is.

"Yeah."

"I hope not." But, you know, this does look exactly like an angel thing. Which would mean that Dean's been rubbing angel on his face, and Sam…

Oh, God. Dean isn't even going to _think_ what the hell that says about Sam.

"Cas? Cas, is that you?" As soon as the words leave Sam's mouth, the light flares up and the high-pitched noise reaches dog-whistle levels. It's as definite a _yes_ as Dean's ever heard.

They look at Castiel in silence for a moment longer, and then Sam says, "I'll. I'll keep him with me, okay?"

"Okay," Dean agrees. The way that Sam is so open to carrying around Castiel is probably something that Dean should be concerned about but, well, one thing at a time. And at the moment, the whole issue of how the fuck aftershave is possessed, and how the fuck Castiel is alive? Probably more important than Sam's weird obsession with Old Spice.

**Author's Note:**

> Currently uploading old fics from the LiveJournal days. This is from spnanonhaven (oh, how I miss thee...) for the prompt "Castiel envessels a bottle of aftershave. Dean uses him (unknowingly) and Sam is suddenly, mysteriously attracted to his brother." It's been almost 5 years, so I think it's probably okay if I come off anon and claim it.


End file.
